A Woman Who Still Love Her Dolls

barbie

Dear Confession,

 Every adult has a hobby. Some adults love going to the gym,  for some, maybe creating artwork, or blogging. I love all these hobbies, but my favorite hobby (besides writing)  is collecting Barbies Dolls.

Yes, I am a 23 year old woman who collects Barbie dolls and on occasion, play with them.

Nope, I have no shame.

giphy.gif

Let me give you a back story about how this all happened…

This phenomenon started when I was a  little girl. Barbie was the golden era of my childhood. I had over maybe 100s of barbies. I had celebrity barbies like the Spice Girls, Britney SpearsBrandy and Shakira

854841405f1ea11c9c984ca20250627b

I also have had a pregnant Barbie doll. Yes, that doll existed until the over-sensitive parents complained that it promoted teen pregnancy.

midge

Oh and did I tell you that on the box, it did say that Midge, the pregnant doll, was married? Most folks don’t read anymore.

 I also had a Barbies pool, Corvette, and a hotel.

barbiehotel

I remember wanting every single Barbie advertised on TV whenever there was a commercial break in between my favorite cartoon shows.

My childhood was completed and blissful until my step father thrown them away in a dumpster behind my back. I was only 11 and that was a dark moment of my childhood. All I had left was my Barbie hotel. My step father few months later asked me if I was ready to get rid of my barbie hotel and I said,”Might as well since my hotel has been out of business for the past few months because no longer have customers.” After giving it away, my relationship with my step-father changed. The trust and the father-daughter relationship was ruined.

tumblr_m6snw15gkv1r11s4xo1_500

So life went on…,but the phenomena did not stop.

During my high school years, whenever I would go shopping, I would go the toy section to check out the new Barbies on display when I had the chance.

During my freshman year in college, I decided to buy a Barbie doll for the first time in six years. I bought a doll, brought it home, but would hide them whenever my parents, friends, or roommate were present. The only two people that knew about my secret was my grandmother and my then-boyfriend at that time.

So throughout my college years, I would buy a doll for special occasions like my birthday or Christmas. Sometimes I would buy one just for the fun of it because I had a job.

I was not the only one in the family that loves to collect dolls.  My Great Aunt Mary also collects Barbie dolls. She has a house full of Barbies from the 1970s to present.  I  love going to her house seeing all the dolls from every decade. It is also fun to share my collection with her.

After my mother’s divorce, I finally confessed to  my (ex) step-father about collecting dolls and expressed how I felt about what he did when I was little. He admitted that since that dark day, he regretted it because he had a chance to build a relationship with me and ruined it. He also realized how doll collecting was the norm. I understood why he has thrown my Barbies away. He thought I was too old for them and expected me to be like any other pre-teen worrying about sports, house parties, and boyfriends. In result of the conversation, I forgave him and he sent me a peace offering by giving me a Harley Quinn doll.

Currently, I am still collecting dolls. I plan on building my own Barbie Dream house from scratch because I have never been a fan of the Barbie homes that is made of out plastic (except the Barbie hotel).  I would love to form a Barbie collecting club. Who knows? A girl can still dream and make it happen.

Life Lesson #86: It’s your thing, do what you want to do, starting with what makes YOU happy first.

Thank You,

Lady Elle~

 

The Creepy Experience of Online Dating

Scared-PC-user

Dear Dating Life,

So a week ago I decided to try online dating for the first time since I have the freedom now ( I had a 6 year relationship). Therefore I would like to say….It was creepy as hell!

creepy computer

So at first, I joined Tinder and I quit right after because it was boring and Tinder had some kind of trick where you have to swipe right to like in order to go to another set of people. For some, you can tell who were potential catfish users and of course there were beautiful people who were probably getting a million likes a day.

eyes roll

After quitting Tinder, a friend recommended me trying Okcupid. I admit, I had fun taking these stupid matchmaking questions, but of course, writing my own profile was time consuming.

tmhnks.gif

I chatted with two guys. One guy was very nice, he was French and an engineer. He had a great sense of humor and he was caring. He asked me 1 day later to go out with him ,but it was too soon for me. However, I kept chatting with him.

Another guy I chatted with was a grad student at the same college I graduated from. He was nice, but from the first chat, I had warning signs and I wished I knew sooner to cut him off for good. He acted clingy or perhaps needy. For example, whenever I get a break from Okcupid he would message me with sad emojis wondering if I have lost interest in him. I explained to him that I was busy.

akward

 

Later we kept chatting on Okcupid and he asked to meet with me in person. I said I would if he agreed to video chat first because meeting people online vs meeting in person is totally different. You never know if the chemistry is real and you can save so much time.

So I was excited yet nervous to finally talk to him and thankfully he was  the same person from the profile picture. However, everything went south!

fall

 

After the fun basic questions, he started asking personal and inappropriate questions like how thick my legs were and how big my breast were. Of course I replied, “None of your damn business!” I was already ready to shut the call down.

delete.gif

After five minutes of giving him hints that I was no longer interested. I  had to tell him straight up that we was not working.

boy bye.gif

I immediately stopped the video call app and deleted my Okcupid account all together. You all can judge me all you want, but I rather meet and feel chemistry in person than online.

After that bad experience from the creepy dude, I feel a little bad about disappearing from the french engineer because I enjoyed chatting with him. There was a connection and a sense of calmness with him unlike the creep. However, my body and spirit said that I need to date nobody but myself. I need to focus only on me because the real world has just started and I need to know more about me.

yay.gif

Overall, it was an experience I had to try.

Life Lesson #85: When life changes, walk, do not run unless…you are in a very bad moment.

Thank you,

Lady Elle~

Comment & Share: Have you ever had a bad online dating experience?

Why Do I Want To Be A Parent?

parent

 

Dear Life,

So this semester I am taking a senior seminar course about Parenting and Families and on the first day of class, my professor asked the class a question that made me wonder about the future.

The professors asked, “Why do you want to become parent?”

That question may be a easy answer to most folks about why they want be parents, but to me, it just got me thinking. I know time has changed the views of having children. For example, I’m sure when it came to colonization we had to have children to populate. The royals have children to bring in an heir to their throne. People back then wanted children to help around the house or soon take over their parent’s businesses. Although this may be true back then, these reasons do not matter as much anymore.We do not need to populate anymore since there are billions of humans living on  this earth.

I feel like people today want to have children because of desire, cultural legacy, investing.

As for me,my reason to have children is a unknown. Why is that? Well, I am an only child that was raised by a single mother. I was an unplanned child and so was my mother so I guess I cannot ask my mother or  my grandmother about why they decided to become parents.

I am a 23 year old woman who is in a long-term relationship with my boyfriend and obviously other people have their reasons for us to get married and have children, especially my boyfriend’s family. My boyfriend is Hispanic and comes from a culture where having children is a cultural legacy. Therefore, I can see some of that influence in him wanting to become a parent.

Why do I want to be a parent? I just don’t know. If I don’t know, does that mean that I should not have children? I dream about what me and boyfriend’s future child will look like sometimes. I daydream about him and I being parents ,but a serious reason? Its a blur ,but if I do have a child one day, I do want him/her to have a sibling because I do not have siblings.

Concluding the topic, I’m still young and about to graduate from college. My focus right now is getting a job and living stable to where I can maybe think about whether I want a legacy or not. If I ever have children,  it would overall be for love.

Life Lesson #79: You may not know what you want now, but you will know one day.

Thank You,

Lady Elle~

Comment & Share: Why do you want to become a parent and what influenced you?