Advice, College Life, Life, Post-Grad Life, Respect

A Perfect Life Sucks!

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Dear Life,

Before I graduated from college, my mind was on Optimistic Island, where I believed that completing a college degree is going to lead me into a world full of fine jobs starting at least on a $30,000 salary scale…

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Oh boy was I DEAD wrong!

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In case some of you are new to this blog site ,or probably missed some of my previous “post-grad blog series”, after college, I went to career fairs, applied for numerous job positions, and tried to network with friendly strangers (also became single for the first time in six years). In result, I held a temporary job as an assessment rater (graded state-wide tests) and now, I am back working full-time (more like 30 hours per week) in retail…

Now of course, there is appreciation for having a job to pay my bills and survive, but to make a living on my own is very impossible.

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However, I am still job-hunting for something better. I just have to keep trying and sometimes use the job I have now to meet and network because you never know who you will meet that will change some of your life for the better.

Gosh, I do envy my cousin sometimes. She is older, currently trying to finish her college degree, but already has a job working for an insurance company that pays her so well that she is able to live on her own and travel to places every season like Las Vegas!

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As for me, I am back living with my mother. However, I cannot complain, but stress that I am not where I want to be right now. On some days, I do question my abilities and wonder what I am doing wrong to prevent greater opportunities from coming. I know for one thing,   I do not fear.

When it comes to job-hunting, I refuse to feel inferior to the hiring managers even when I am a bit nervous. I pretend that I am casually meeting new potential friends with a spice of professionalism of course.

As for applying for jobs, I am only applying three to  five times a week since I have a retail job to fall back on. Before, I was putting so much pressure and stress on me  applying for at least 20 jobs per day to the point when I get emails from different companies about a job interview (mostly  rejection) and I barely remembered which companies I applied for.

 

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Forrest is right…life is like a box of chocolates…I will never know what I am going to get.

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However, life has never been easy. Life is suppose to have struggles, pain, and suffering.

Imagine if life is forever perfect! That will suck, right?

Let’s take…Odysseus for example.  What if he did not have to fight in the Trojan War, bang all the goddesses, and go through hell to return back home to Ithaca. What the plot just said that he went to war, won the war, and returned home to spend time with his son? That will be a boring story, right?

Here is another example, what if Mufasa from the Lion King movie never died? What if Scar was really a good uncle? Would Simba really be the rightful and happy king of the pride lands without the suffering and discovering who he was with the help of Timon and Pumba?! Without Timon and Pumba, we will never know Hakuna Matata!

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What I am trying to say is that…LIFE IS NOT SUPPOSE TO BE PERFECT!

It is okay to go through some things that we sometimes cannot control like our emotions and mentality! If you have depression, anxiety, or other mental illness that is preventing you from having joy, remember that you are creating a beautiful life story of getting better even it is one step at a time. When you come out of that dark moment of your life, you should celebrate it and share that perfect dark yet beautiful life story to someone who is still in the dark trying to get out.  Of course mental illness is not a perfect happy story, but it is a perfect uplifting inspiration for someone who needs to hear it to know that they are NOT alone.

Having an imperfect life defines who we are. So Forrest, pass that box of chocolates!

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Life Lesson #87: “Life does not give you seat-belts.” -Lego Batman

Thank You,

Lady Elle~

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Advice, College Life, Confessions of A Woman, Dating, Life, Love, Relationships, Silly, Social Media

The Creepy Experience of Online Dating

Scared-PC-user

Dear Dating Life,

So a week ago I decided to try online dating for the first time since I have the freedom now ( I had a 6 year relationship). Therefore I would like to say….It was creepy as hell!

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So at first, I joined Tinder and I quit right after because it was boring and Tinder had some kind of trick where you have to swipe right to like in order to go to another set of people. For some, you can tell who were potential catfish users and of course there were beautiful people who were probably getting a million likes a day.

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After quitting Tinder, a friend recommended me trying Okcupid. I admit, I had fun taking these stupid matchmaking questions, but of course, writing my own profile was time consuming.

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I chatted with two guys. One guy was very nice, he was French and an engineer. He had a great sense of humor and he was caring. He asked me 1 day later to go out with him ,but it was too soon for me. However, I kept chatting with him.

Another guy I chatted with was a grad student at the same college I graduated from. He was nice, but from the first chat, I had warning signs and I wished I knew sooner to cut him off for good. He acted clingy or perhaps needy. For example, whenever I get a break from Okcupid he would message me with sad emojis wondering if I have lost interest in him. I explained to him that I was busy.

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Later we kept chatting on Okcupid and he asked to meet with me in person. I said I would if he agreed to video chat first because meeting people online vs meeting in person is totally different. You never know if the chemistry is real and you can save so much time.

So I was excited yet nervous to finally talk to him and thankfully he was  the same person from the profile picture. However, everything went south!

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After the fun basic questions, he started asking personal and inappropriate questions like how thick my legs were and how big my breast were. Of course I replied, “None of your damn business!” I was already ready to shut the call down.

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After five minutes of giving him hints that I was no longer interested. I  had to tell him straight up that we was not working.

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I immediately stopped the video call app and deleted my Okcupid account all together. You all can judge me all you want, but I rather meet and feel chemistry in person than online.

After that bad experience from the creepy dude, I feel a little bad about disappearing from the french engineer because I enjoyed chatting with him. There was a connection and a sense of calmness with him unlike the creep. However, my body and spirit said that I need to date nobody but myself. I need to focus only on me because the real world has just started and I need to know more about me.

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Overall, it was an experience I had to try.

Life Lesson #85: When life changes, walk, do not run unless…you are in a very bad moment.

Thank you,

Lady Elle~

Comment & Share: Have you ever had a bad online dating experience?